Monday, December 19, 2011

He's there, all right.

Suspended animation
when he comes
out of the shadows
oh, he knows
he makes me sick
inhabits me
uses others
and their actions
and images of them
to make me bleed
and he's aware
that he scares
the shit out of me
his name is doubt
he smiles death
he smiles clout
when he comes
he overcomes
and i bleed
in my sleep
until I cry
and he still won't let me be.....

Tuesday, December 13, 2011


lying in the grass
on my stomach
elbows down, chin in hands

talking to a dandelion

It wants to know
why that bright popping yellow
is an eyesore, to the world

I don't know, I said

Maybe because dandelions
aren't hard work
you're just there, eternal

the dandelion cried

I understood this.

Is the world we live in
set to see beauty
only in things that cost
or come from indelible effort?

Are we not allowed
to be awed
by something that the planet
just gives us

or asks little from us for?

I left the dandelion there
in the corner of my yard
and never cut him down

and when he turned gray
as all things eventually do
and his seeds were cast to the wind

I smiled a little
knowing there would be hundreds more because of him

Monday, December 12, 2011

Too Late For Redemption

I've never understood the acceptance of a bricklayer
and I have always been suspicious of guitar players
I've spent too many years as a nightmare slayer
I've long believed I have never had a prayer

I'm buried somewhere beneath these all these layers

I guess I never thought to put my hand out at the dance
The thievery of others made me believe I had no chance
Never saw a painting of love I thought I could enhance
It's hard to focus your walk when you're in a trance

I'm lost somewhere in with the dirt and the ants

So who do I think the man in the mirror is now
The one who expects a warning shot across his bow
Drives to work augmented with suicidal know-how
The man who had fantasies he will no longer allow

I'm lost somewhere without love endowed

Haven't had a day where I didn't have hate
for those that take for granted what I never could create
cracking bones, sore feet, reheated food on my plate
ice cold sheets, pillows, and blankets await

I'm too exhausted, too lonely, too cried out to be irate

wanting to lay in bloodstains on the floor
wandering aimlessly out on the moors
waiting for the claws and teeth that won't be ignored
and that pop and smoke that closes the door

I don't want to be lost here anymore
surrounded but ignored.