Friday, May 10, 2013

Complaining and Asking For More

“Scientists talk about dark matter, the invisible, mysterious substance that occupies the space between stars. Dark matter makes up 99.99 percent of the universe, and they don't know what it is. Well I do. It's apathy. That's the truth of it; pile together everything we know and care about in the universe and it will still be nothing more than a tiny speck in the middle of a vast black ocean of Who Gives a Fuck.”
David Wong, John Dies at the End 

“The opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference. The opposite of art is not ugliness, it's indifference. The opposite of faith is not heresy, it's indifference. And the opposite of life is not death, it's indifference.”

  






times come and go
where the wind around me smells wrong
trying to figure out what I know
forgetting lyrics to my favorite songs

raised in the church
rulebooks laid out open wide
but that stuff is for kids
adulthood teaches the other side

takers get things handed continually
violators get off scot-free
criminals have 60 inch televisions
while war vets struggle to even see

halfway through this life
I look back at a lifetime of trying for others
told what I did is now stupidity
while laziness and victimization still hovers

complaining and asking for more

Nice guys don't get paid
of wisdom, that's indeed a pearl
the way I see things may be naive
but I've never hurt a person in this world

I could take pride in that
if I didn't have hands in my pockets
I feel as if I don't fit here sometimes
maybe should be seated on a rocket

because I can't identify at times
don't know why things are okay
I don't see reason in others' rhymes
too many games I do not play

so I guess I have a lot of growing up to do
hardening and changing as I see things unfold
because I don't want to be seeking truths
while I'm trying to achieve honor as I grow old

complaining and asking for more.

Monday, April 8, 2013

Cries and whispers

I swear I heard thunder
I know I felt rain
It seems every blunder
Comes just before the pain

It's all like a storm

I feel guilty
Asking god for things
When I normally don't believe he's there

And I feel stupid
That I'm so desperate
I've somehow resorted to prayer

It's all like a storm with lightning


That started a flame
People hold me up to
To try and figure me out

I'm looking at people
I don't get you all either
Please don't have any doubt


It's a lonely world folks
Being like a grown up version
Of that lost wandering kid in the parking lot

Waiting for momma
Hoping that poppa
Will come and wipe away the snot

Well I'm past 40 now
There's no mom and dad anymore
I've left them all behind

I've got to figure out myself somehow
And start the game over again
As someone else this time....


Sunday, April 7, 2013

Guess I didn't know

Didn't know where I stood
When things are okay thanks to standing
I guess I know now

Can't let go
Of things glossed over
By society or a shrug
Maybe it's just me

I now understand
Worley's haunting
Someone's ok with something
Or worse its forgotten with a smile

Am I the only one here
With a flushed face
And tears in my eyes
Loading my fists?

I now understand
The McManus' plotting
I'm not gonna forget
What others rather would

Even the victims can't see
They haven't hurt just them
They've also hurt me

So I boil like a kettle
Because I've been good
I've tested my own mettle
Just to have backs turned on me

Only to be pushed again....
Being right, doing right
Pays less than being a fucking bastard
And people make up the truth anyway

Maybe it's just me

Because I understand
Bullock's fists
I can stand over blood and bones
And feel justified
And smile.

Feeling alone in these moments
I don't understand anyone
And no one understands me

Am I afraid of my own rage?
Yes, indeed I am
But I respect it
And I know it's right

Because its borne
Of righteousness
And love.

Not self gratification
And satisfaction

But I'll never be right in any occasion
They only got Capone for tax evasion

Now I understand
Billy Jack's feet today
But even that one ton soldier
Got hauled away